How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
