Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
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