It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
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