She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Alive.
So much puke
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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