hotel room ftw
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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