Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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