I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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