turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
