he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
