is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
there is puke in my bra ... again
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
