Got a toothbrush?
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
