Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
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