Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
