Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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