those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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