sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize