the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
