She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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