I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
