he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
