That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
