I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He better not be in your backpack
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
