I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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