oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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