from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
