after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
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