haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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