Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
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