Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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