Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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