So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
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