i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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