Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
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