Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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