I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
