I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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