You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i drank out of a bidet.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
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