saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
