ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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