Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
