I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize