she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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