lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
