I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize