Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize