There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize