Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
