I can tuck mytits in my pants
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
