the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
