the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
