she looked like the before picture.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize