There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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